UNCONDITIONAL LOVE

How to function when one is in physical pain? Got a headache, a blister on your heel, a hangnail or a sliver in your finger, a paper cut on your hand? Any pain at all?

Trick to keeping a positive attitude when one is in pain, is this possible? There are people who wake up with physical pain everyday, and have to force a smile and relate to people who have no pain and just aren't in a person's realm who are suffering pain. We simply cannot expect a person who is in pain to always be thinking positively, it is not a reality, it is something we can expect that s/he will be miserable and unable to relate in the same way to another person as one can if one is not in any pain at all.

How to determine what to say to a person who is in constant pain? Should we bring up their pain in conversation, or simply ignore it so that person does not center and focus on the pain. What can we offer to a person who is in constant pain? A gift will not take the pain away, we can pray but there might still be constant pain after prayers.

The best way to know what to do for a person who is in constant physical pain is to empathize, use the opportunity of trying to understand someone's pain by actualizing it when you too are in pain in someday someway. Feel it. Feel the pain and feel it in depth. If you get a momentary headache or other body ache, see how it makes you feel. Feel how it can bring down your mood, and cause you to feel bad even when there is nothing else to cause a bad feeling, just your constant pain.

Be patient with the person who is experiencing the pain, give them slack, give them the benefit of the doubt, forgive them easier and more often, you may have to forgive them every time you talk to them. They may slip up in their words and not always say the appropriate words, because pain drives them and they could be argumentative because pain controls them and they are really fighting their pain but it comes out as if it is a fight between them and you.

Be as nice to these people as you  possibly can. Realize how awful it must be to be in constant pain, and show these people loving-kindness and compassion. Think for these people when they cannot think for themselves, give them a helping hand.

This is what true love is all about, loving someone even though their physical pain drives them to withhold love for you in return. Love someone who cannot love you back. Give them all you can give them without expecting a reward or any kindness in return. Do not love them in exchange for anything back, because pain can take away the ability to return a kindness. Give and give and do not tire of giving. This is what "unconditional love" is all about. Those people be they in pain or not who receive unconditional love are the most blessed people in the world.

If you find yourself in the position of being able to give unconditional love, you may someday be lucky enough to receive it, but if not, the act of giving it should be a reward in itself.