Words of the Wise In Years

Homebody, everybody, fun on Chanukah, parties, family and friends, included, not included, creative solitary moments, in touch with the Divine, holy purifications not needed, purer than new fallen snow, whiter than white even wearing black, Daddy's girl, doctors lawyers, protected and sheltered, well fed, free foods, watching cholesterol intake, glucose counts, counting but not money, enjoying the richest of viands at no cost, you Barren One who did not travail, dancing with women not with men, kicking up heels and participating in all--One in all, all in One. Convert and stranger, ger, meaning "sojourn," legal contract that proves my Judaism, their family rumors, untruths, a line of people with broken lineages, descendant of King David, the Anointed One. Xmas celebrations and turning baby Jesus into baby Moses, not seeing stores' Xmas decorations, spared of the hype, radio stations from Tel Aviv Israel, mysteries and myths. Women deserving human rights, women purer than the snow, tougher than nails, sweeter than candy, nicer than nice, smarter than smart. Learning everyday and teaching born Jews, Jews who know nothing, Rabbis telling me to be a Rabbi, Rabbis speaking, and I am listening, learning, guru and librarian with all the answers. Ask me 4 questions and I will give you 70 answers! But not if you don't want to know. Open books, reading same books 1000 times, learning something new each time, guided by the spirits, spirits are angels, keeping an empty glass without water at bedside, not thirsty, not demonic, protected as a orphan, ger, fatherless, widow, poor, Levite, always in a shell. But not eating shellfish. And not selfish, sharing my poetry with the world, read on and delight in creative wisdom: Cho-achma is wisdom, the language of the wise. Wiser with age and older everyday, wiser everyday. Women who are wise. Deborah the Judge, judges but not judgmental, Judge Judy--You won the case, pay up. Poetry for free because food is free. Eat up, read up and enjoy!

The Forever Blooming Flower of a Lost Love

 

If you have loved and lost, and your love was true, truer than the color blue, then you will never recover, it all depends on how true your love was. Love that was truer than the splash of a tidal wave, or a tsunami, or a bolt of lightening, or as gentle and needy as a stray cat's meow as she licked the milk you put out for her: this love will never be lost. When the wind blows and your lover walks away to see life on her own: it is a spiritual connection that you will never lose. Adonai becomes your Lover instead, and all of life afterwards is provided to you as a gift from God.

A love that quakes your inner passions like a spitting volcano, every time you wake in the morning; love that enabled you to sleep on a rock instead of a pillow and not feel the stiffness in your neck,... real love. Love that changed you into a better person, when she leaves, you will continue to be that person. When love strikes you like a quick slip on pavement and you fall! But do not break a leg. Such is the luck of a true love. When every blue sky is your heaven, and you shared your heavens with your lover, this will never change, all your skies will still be blue. Soul mates for life, and in death, buried amongst your lover's family, one love, two loves, true loves. A hearty hardy heart, with a soft open palm, will never lose its vitality. Love spreads around, once you have caught it, it never disappears, you have it and you have it forever. Such is the affair of the broken-hearted. Your heart has been struck by Cupid. She may disappear, but her love for you itself, that is within your spirit, will linger on for eternity...like a forever blooming flower.

Hot Spaghetti and the Headless Cooks

 

Roman spaghetti cooked to perfect perfection but over-dosed with a spicy hot fire of flaming red sauce, a Spanish delight hot as can be, hot sauce, hot hearts, the Romantic Languages of Spain and Italy and France, hot spaghetti and the cooks are fired in a hot kiln. Fired and now on the unemployment line, lines getting longer, no one eating spaghetti anymore, just dreaming of it on an empty stomach. Spaghetti so hot it burned our delicate tasting tongues--hot with wrathful anger but not hot enough to make a point: messing with our stomachs is no way to get a disagreement settled. Stomach linings burning, tracheas burping, and head cooks drowning in poisoned meat sauce. Spoiling foods to get a point across. The Judge sits on his bench--the judge rules them 3 strikes you are out--giving them a seat on the "out" bench. Out in the cold for a hot idea, a hot head, a hot sauce. Red meat sauce Kosher as can be, will stay Kosher, without the hot-headed cooks. Without a blemish on the sacrifice to Him, but yes, there are blemishes on the cooks. They can be warned with a yellow flag: Try it one more time and you will be eating dust. A memory on my frying pan: he does not do the cooking anymore. Headless heartless cooks replaced by good cooks at a job interview. Fiesta Kosher Fish Fillets tonight and tomorrow too. Bon appetit!

Tips On How To Join A New Shul

When leaving the old and familiar and sojourning into a new land, new ideas, new everything, do not be afraid to get your feet wet. Dip in your toes into the warm sandy beach and then into the cool blue water and feel it with all of your might, submerge more of your foot, and then more, until whallah! You are in the water and trying to swim. Keep paddling your arms, one stroke over your head and then another stroke, keep trying and keep swimming. No this is not a lesson on swimming, this is a lesson on how to deal with changes in your life: new activities, new jobs, new Shuls, new congregations, etc. It will be exciting to submerge your whole body, you will feel the extreme spiritual sensations, and the immediate chill of the new water, but as you stay in the water your body will get adjusted and it will start to feel warmer as your body temperature syncs in with the temps of the water. Find a sandbar, rest there, and all will be well.

Fighting Giants With a Pen and Ink

 

Not playing by their rules, rules that are broken as we ride against the wind as cowboys on stronger horses, more horses, numbers win, giants fall as did Goliath, and it was my great great great Grandfather King David who slew the Goliath, he did it as a small man, with an Almighty God guiding his pebble. Their rules are not my rules, there is strength in learning and greater strength in teaching, teaching to change the world, to provide tikkun olam.

She teaches to do tikkun olam too. She has 500 hungry mouths who want to learn from Her, mouths that are not hungry for food, but for knowledge, for Her wisdom. I was hungry for food, but I was the only one who was. I was a student with a backpack on my back and carrying heavy books, now the books condensed into a small paperback with the entire contents of my learning material all there, ready for the reading.

Martin Luther King Day is next Monday, he was said to be a man who sought peace, and he marched through White neighborhoods without throwing rocks. In Israel the Palestinians throw rocks at windows of buses filled with school children. Moses struck the rock twice to bring water to the Israelites after his sister Miriam passed away and the water disappeared, but God did not approve of Mose's violence as a means to provide nutrients to the people as Miriam provided it; instead what God did was He put Moses to death and forbid him to enter or see the Promised Land. There are those who want to put Moses's descendants to death for the same reason; but the Torah says that the children of a parent are not to be punished for a parent's crime. There are women descendants of Moses who are targeted and children who are innocent who are also targeted, and this is unethical. There is no crime greater than thinking one is God himself, and killing as God had killed. We must re-think our intentions and realize there is only One God and that if you are arrogant enough to think you are God, then you are the one who is to be punished.

Waking Up With Wisdom: A Morning With a Sigh of Relief. Selah...

 

Hatzi Kaddish with billions in a minyan over Cyberspace, everyone in the world counts. Counting my lucky stars on the Havdalot, 3 stars in the sky, 6-pointed stars: Stars of Bathshebah, David's wife. She glows in every star in the sky, but all we need is 3: My mother and sister and me=3. Sisters all over the world, literate sisters, brain-active sisters, strong heart-pumping sisters, tefillin-donning sisters. Every morning w/o fail, waking up, "Modeh Ani. Shema Y'israel, Adonai Eloheinu, Adonai Ehad." Tallit Katan over head and shoulders, breathing deeply in gasps of strength as a result.

Freezing temps here in Chicago today, fingertips wrapped in tefillin leather cold, but heart is warm. Warm heart, good life. Golden tallit wrapped over shoulders with maroon bands, tzitzit in perfect shape, no tangling of tassles, no muss no fuss. Shining golden sitting on a throne, Moses was the leader: leading means fearing only God, and not fearing Moses. Awe coming in gentle breezes, escalating my heartbeat, heart throbbing in rhythm with the wind as it bends tall and brown as skeletal grass sways dormant out my window in the winter. Not fearing the wind, a blast of wind is a gentle gust when I am in sync with Wisdom, when I am in sync with Her. Cho-achma teaches me and I teach Her cho-achma. We are cho-achma together. Together every morning wearing tefillin tightly. Sigh of relief. Selah...

A True Leader Fears Only God

Gobs of packed hard icy snow, much too cold to call it moisture: flakes are frozen. Tefillin removed till tomorrow, not understanding why they say "Girlz just wanna have fun." The colors pink and blue have undergone a metamorphic change into dark shades of dark navy and deep earth tone browns. Solid, sure footing, no threats, bomb shelters empty, rockets not flying into my backyard. Tefillin rested securely on my upper hairline all morning long--sustaining me as a memory of feeling skies and heavens and ascending into higher thoughts, higher ethics, higher motives, higher goals: living north and north is upwards. Going up for Aliyah as a weekly endeavor.

Lighter blue and whiter skies, reaching higher heavens and attending meetings with angels: angels watching, keeping a close eye on things.  Eyebrows curling upwards and meeting in the middle, brow slanting downwards but not observing the ground, now knowing where to step.

Deep seas, deep thinking, wondering why flowers become weeds? What is it all worth? It is worth Her motivations, Her progress, Her beginnings and middles, Her future: Her sparks were already there and She just needed some fuel and a match.

Teaching survival of the fittest. Defending one's status, not taking back seat, no complaints: taking it to the top does not count when you on are the top. She is not a spy, not in disguise, She came out as Esther with truthfulness and honesty, not cunning. King means Melekh and Melekh means King--no confusion: Deborah was a Judge, before there were such things as Kings.

In the marketplace, a positive attitude means having no attitude at all: therefore no reform, no change, no one has to work harder than they can or want to. Getting used to the mud, no one shoveling it out, forming holes of quicksand, watching where I step. On a higher plane away from the confusion, the noise, the stuff. Not hearing loud noises, no scary impact and no nervous effect: a true Leader only fears God.    

Wearing Tefillin With a Brain Not Just a Pretty Face

 

Typing poetry with tefillin, chanting without tremors, standing without faltering, knees together bending and bowing, not breaking, notes escalating, but tefillin shielding brain with an absence of a body, body and brain One, brain being in command, God is One. Need for materializing not materialism, blood flowing strong, arms tight--mighty bows bent, no arrows: instead yads pointed, pointing to musical tropes, creating own tropes, singing with Her. Seeing the leather box upon my head, feeling hard like stone: impenetrable.

Warmth becomes a fur coat, draped around a numb body but not dumb brain--thinking focused brain. Silences thought-provoking, chanting has an effect, words great Hebrew words, music great Hebrew music, tefillin tight, brain commanding thoughts and actions. Mathematics strong, becoming poetry at will, God's Will.

Penetrating my concern into her soul, wondering if a spark can be ignited. Lighting a spark even in fossilized wood. Is the wood too many generations old? She turned into a salt pillar because she looked back. I looked back into ancient history, salt is rock hard: tefillin in the morning, maybe in the afternoon, wearing leather tefillin as un-ardorous armour, love is just a 4-letter word, needing no brass knuckles, desert dryness, parchedness, in a long navy skirt, pants. Not feeding him a dessert.

Deborah led an army, Golda Meir led them too, brain activity kept them protected, protons and electrons shooting like slingshots, not seeing targets, hazy, enemies no more. Standing taut and firm, they whispered their chant. Eyes closed, ears open, imagination soaring. Advertent self-deafness and blindness, stood strong on one leg with 4 leather straps, shifted to 2 legs, sat down rock hard on a metal chair, so hard like stone when I am not stoned. Miriam's Well flowing all day in a desert; then they go  home, Moses strikes the rock 2x, and they run away to cinnamon hills. Living w/o Moses, w/o cinnamon, but w/o needing an escape. We used to wear tefillin all day long.

Waterfalls Gushing But Dams[els] Holding Back the Floods

Avoidance, deep set unwaivering contentedness: Moses was raised in an Egyptian home and adopted by non-Jews who paid his real birth mother wages to care for Moses throughout his entire childhood, God talked only to Moses. Then She opened her mouth with loud sweet soprano singing, cold fingers, no blood circulating, low body temperatures, fasted on 10 Tevet, perfect low blood pressure, actively seeking warmer heated stimulation, sweaters, woman of valor not knitting, buying golden garments, priestly garments. Waking up in the morning with a brain, going back to intellectual activities, not seeking anymore, sought and found. Computer access, all one needs is the Internet, and a thinking but gently hydrated brain and body, water flowing in bits and pieces, not gushing, no tidal waves to drown me, sitting back and relaxing, then thinking again, avoiding mouthing the wrong trumpets, avoiding mouthing trumpets at all: pianos with soprano notes and bass notes, voices, speeches, then no more frustration, my job has been learning Torah, winning the lottery again, and again and again.

Checking out whiteness, pure cold snow whiteness and needing no mikvah, mikvah splashing is for the involved, no throbbing penetrations here, imaginations igniting sparks, but no frustrations, needs all being met, water flowing, then looking to Miriam's Well after being in a thunderstorm, lightening hits for a moment but always misses me, never getting burned, away from direct sunlight, shaded but not by Jonah's gourd. Favorite plants, poignant flowers I see everyday, wildflowers but tamed, parks, fields and more fields, flying pure white screeching Levite seagulls soaring in freedom over flowers and dark deep green lagoons. No one brings me flowers anymore, needing no apologies, no fighting, stepping outside in a field of wildflowers, needing no flower deliveries. No needs, enjoying the moment, learning mathematics, poetic math,  consistent contact with figure eights, eight becoming ten without a minyan, Kaddishes becoming Kiddushes, not mourning, awaking early in the morning to think again.

Laughing and giggling, reassuring, letting them know even the strong need a rest, even the lions need to stop roaring, nighttime comes and beds that are made become unmade, needing no maids, but she is there when I need her.

Contentedness through brain activity, healthy circulations, contented to just sit and look around smile and giggle, then the lion wakes up, the sleeping dog no longer lies, and again there is action, all day long. Longing for another day like this one. Tomorrow again, I prophesy, it will be another good day.

Two Midwives Who Defied Male Authority to Save the Lives of Hebrew Children

Waking up early, prophesying that the sun will be dawning, silk scarves shining like sunlit skies, light bulbs glaring bright white like a burning white dwarf star, burning with the desire to learn more: Puah and Shiphrah, 2 Hebrew Midwives, defied Pharoah, defied a male king, and told him that the Hebrew babies were born before they could get there to birth them. The Hebrew first born babies were saved this way, even though Pharoah decreed all first born Hebrew baby boys to be killed. Their lives were saved by 2 Hebrew women who defied male authority. And Moses was for the little guy, he slew an Egyptian taskmaster who was beating on a Hebrew slave. My name is Batyah, Batyah drew Moses out of the river Nile in a basket and raised Moses with the help of Hebrew nannies. Moses was raised in a non-Jewish household, but he became the greatest of all the Prophets.

Rising to see a new sun, rising to understand humankind and its impact on world order, is the world getting worse or is it getting better? Is the world improving--according to Torah--and who are the ones who are really improving it and how, and who are the true mentors to follow? Separation from evil causes softness and an inability to fight off oppression due to not having the experiences to become a better warrior--Moses was able to fight off a taskmaster, the Hebrew midwives were able to fight off the Pharoah's evil decree. Fighting for one's rights and the rights of others, and fighting to climb Jacob's ladder are all fights that put one in a better place--closer to "The Pearly Gates." Doing Mitzvot is doing acts of loving-kindness, like the fighting for oneself and/or for another. Fighting can be with fists, or guns as the IDF fights, or in a divorce court, or as Moses fought to save the life of a slave, or in modern day using a computer keyboard, or using a paintbrush as a social justice tool as the greatest artists fought, or through speeches as the Rabbis fight, or by insisting on a change--on a choice to be chosen to be won like a battle, a difference in one's life, getting what is one's right to receive, what is one's entitlement.

Fighting for Rights is the Right thing, the Right thing to do is to follow Torah: To be defiant against authority, including male authority, when it saves your life or the lives of others as Moses saved the Hebrew slave. To be defiant is to be healthy, to get one's juices to flow like droplets of springtime waters, sweet showers, not to be consumed by tidal waves. Health is being able to think and to write and to cause action. To be able to act, to think, to choose, to fight. HASHEM believed in equal rights for the Hebrew slaves to achieve freedom and dignity as we were once the "little guys"--we were once strangers in the Land of Egypt, and we were once slaves there too.

New dawns every day, new learning, singular sweet drops of dew, drop by drop off icicles, wetness, thinking and achieving, having a name: Sarah, Rivkah, Rachel, Leah, and Batyah. Joining together with one's sisters, sweet singing together in harmony with one's sisters, thinking and comprehending, gaining strength everyday, more sisters, more strength, more achievement: more gains on the Battlefield, in the Courts, in the Shuls, in the World.

Owning and Breathing My Own Air Flow: Strongly, Steadily

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh... deeply inhaling, calmly exhaling, seeking calm contentedness not contrived happinesses, breathing without a demon's directives, freely inhaling and exhaling at my own choice, when I want to breathe and how I want to breathe, without being a crowd pleaser, without following someone else's instructions on the best way to breathe or the only way to breathe, or how not to breathe and then to accept the consequences. Freely taking deep inner open lung breaths, stopping an inhalation when I want to, and breathing on cue when I am the director of the symphony only, my own music, my own drum. Windy gasps coming like soprano sweet music, wide pleasant open mouth, polished white teeth, strong lungs contracting in rhythm as God gives me the great and holy power to open my serious mouth or flaring nostrils, welcoming and absorbing clean rich oxygen, closing doors and then exhaling carbon dioxide, oxygen begging me to become utilized, coming as hunted prey in traps like earnings after employment, but earned as spoils after a war, delivered to the door of my pursed thick lips, when I want to breathe, how I want to breathe, not at another's discretion or orders. My own menu, my own power, my own almighty lung contractions, my own air, my own life, my own, my own... I am the owner of my own life, the owner of my own property, my own body, my own mind, heart and spirit, I am in control of myself and what is mine, what I need, what I want, what I can do without, and therefore what I receive or do not receive as I like and choose. My hand is open to only God's graciousness, leaving food on my plate for god. Finding freedom raining on me in light springtime refreshing sprinkles even in wintertime, not as distant thunderstorms with shocking burning lightening, everyday, every way, in cleansing purities like dew not sweat on the tender but tough skin. Fighting with a smile knowing I always win, winning air, increasing my abilities to breathe cleaner fresher greater puffs, when I want to, how I want to, as I want to. My lungs have expanded and grown through trial and error and experimentation, and the blood vessels have increased in capacity and volume, healthier redder blood, stronger connections, greater flow, more individualized as a community, stronger choosier choices, changing only when I want to change, it is my life, mine, my ownership; as God provides.