A LIFE WITHOUT ADDICTIONS, HAPPINESS THAT IS REAL

What to think if you share with someone a difficulty you have faced and how you overcame it, and the person who you told this to responds with sorrow for you and says dishonestly that he has no problems at all? How can we believe someone who consistently denies having everyday problems that happen to everyone, and how can we believe someone who says they never have a problem?

Washing away every problem with a drink of red wine, flushing it all away as you sip red wine that becomes your problem, in addition to these everyday problems you are having but say you are not having.

To endanger your kidneys and liver, so all your everyday problems go away, but now what you have is Fatty Liver Disease and Kidney Disease instead of an admittance to normal everyday problems. Sipping this wine and forgetting all bad occurrences, getting dizzy in the brain to chase away these everyday problems that happen to you, as to everyone else, just so you can lie and say "You do not have any problems!"

Having an inability to feel compassion for those who trust you with their life's trials and tribulations, red wine coloring your spectacles rose-colored, so you cannot feel the plight of another and therefore cannot help others when they need you and come to you for your help and affection.

Aggressiveness, fits of uncontrollable anger, as a result of too much red wine! An inability to concentrate, your blood as red as this red wine, bleeding everyday like everyone else, but laughing in a drunken state while bleeding.

Warming yourself, heating up your fires, fires of anger and fires of passion. Losing good heartedness as you lose concern for your problems as well as concern for the problems of others.

Laughing instead at someone's problems because they are their problems and not yours. Not being happy for other's when they have happiness, instead to be happy if someone has troubles, the red wine being the cause of your hatred as it alters the state of your brain and emotions.

To have the greatness to be free of an addiction to the chemicals in liquor that are the cause of this hatred, anger, and unhappiness from poor health that will be your condition in the long run.

Having a healthy liver and kidneys, and a healthy attitude of life, to be able to be there for others, not to laugh or make fun of other's problems, not to make light of someone else's plight.

To have a smile that is real, and not caused by addiction or drunkenness. To be blessed with having true honest happiness, that comes to you because of your acts of loving-kindness, not from your drinking of red wine from the bottle.

Finding an old wine bottle in the lake with a message inside that reads: "DO NOT DRINK."

To then be able to throw a full bottle of red wine back into the lake, so it drowns itself and does not drown you.

RAISING CHILDREN AS DOCTORS INSTEAD OF JANITORS

Raising children, is there more to it than changing their diapers?

To love your child, to guide him, to have high expectations of your children, to bestow upon them your encouragement to succeed their parents' achievements.

To be there for them and to nurture and believe in them. To not be their judge, instead to be their motivator. To let them know when they error and do wrong. To tell them what you expect of them is to reach their highest potential, encouraging them to strive higher than you did.

To encourage a child to do better, to know more. To be a leader to your child, to have footsteps that are good enough for them to walk in. To teach your children not to hate but to forgive. To not harbor your children's bad experiences but to teach your child to overcome them, to put them behind him.

To be slow to anger, to not in a fit of anger teach your child to respond to obstacles with such anger, but to show them how to be influential, diplomatic, and to use justice in their dealings as you study it in The Talmud and then they study it.

To love your child but not with a smothering suffocating love, to encourage your children's social abilities with others not to be just under your wing exclusively, to allow them to soar like the birds and to hover like the Angels.

To teach your children of the Commandments of The Torah. To not get pregnant and not have children at all if these are functions you cannot perform.

Loving your kids, means more than putting their food on their table, watching instead your own p's and q's so your child has a good example in you that they can follow.

NURTURING FROM THE HOLY JEWISH SPIRITS ON SUKKOT

To not expect or solicit kind words from others as your encouragement to make it through each day. To not expect a parent or sibling to show you respect or boost your morale. Instead of relying on a brother when you are in dire need of feeling the approval of others, rely instead on a friend. A person who has no blood ties and is not in a competition with you to be the first one or the best one or to be Mommy's "little girl." Not to ask a family member for support when they themselves are dried out and burnt out. To not be the one to be in need of their "unconditional" love that you are dependent on, and you continue to ask for it, but then, find that the wells are dry.

Look instead to G-D to be the One to supply you with what you need and require for your daily support, and not be dependent on support from a mortal who errors and who cannot give you what you need.

Petition G-D in a personal prayer, just from you to Him, and ask Him to fulfill your needs, to even go beyond fulfilling your needs and to even fulfill your most earnest desires. To not depend on mortals who have not the power or ability to be there for you, to look to G-D instead Who is everywhere, His goodness being just a smile away, instead of asking for your cup to be filled, to use G-D's love to fill the cup of your neighbor's whose cup is empty. Not needing them to thank you for your mitzvoth instead to give anonymously so only G-D is the One Who knows that you have given generously, not to embarrass those who receive your charity.

After asking G-D to be there for you and to sustain your efforts with His constant strength and kindness, and to receive His love, as His beloved one, to feel His presence in your environment wherever you happen to be.

To love the color GOLD and to then see this color in the trees in your back or front yard, to be supplied with so much gold as it is the color of every one of thousands of leaves on these trees, to turn each golden leaf into a spirit as it then falls from these trees, and to honor these spirits in these leaves as being symbols of the holy spirits of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah. To then add your own deceased family relatives to this list of spirits with whom you can connect.

To soon be in a Sukkah on the Jewish Holiday of Sukkot and each day of this Holiday to welcome another holy spirit of the Prophets and Prophetesses with your personal family members into this Sukkah with you to be in a place of richness, even though just in a hut, to be in this poor hut called a Sukkah but to be surrounded with the emotional richness of the constant love of those who mean the most to you, to be always nurtured by the greatest of spirits from The Torah and by your deceased family, to be surrounded in this Sukkah by your true friends.

To have this love and nurturing on this Jewish Holiday of Sukkot as you attract those who love you and those who you love.

A BODY THAT TURNS HEADS

Gaining/losing pounds around your midriff, peeling off pounds one at a time, one day at a time, turning around at the waist, wasted calories not heat or energy around your waist.

Climbing up upon a standing weight scale once a month, watching the pounds drip off like water after a bath, feeling your once-too-tight pants bagging in the back, pulling up trousers as they fall, tightening a belt buckle on a closer notch, summertime's around the corner, bathing beauties of muscles not fat.

Avoiding that extra chocolate chip cookie, removing one piece of bread from your sandwich, scraping off the jelly eating only the peanut butter. Choosing leafy greens over pizza slices, craving salads instead of cakes.

The numbers going down, losing a few pounds consistently every month. Exercising everyday with long walks, playing basketball, tossing a Frisbee to a dog in the park, climbing up the ladder of a children's slide to enjoy sliding down as does your kid.

Feeling a bitter cold blast of wind that causes you torque as you fight against it, using more energy, using more calories, a body that fights the life of a sluggard, feeling your high boots getting tighter as your leg calf muscles get firmer.

Feet that can carry you everywhere, not to be dependent upon a car or sleigh or boat, to beat the heat in long steady strides of strong legs, to feel then as if in flight, to be as light as the feather from a bird falling from the sky.

Having a body of which you are proud, a body that shows off your work in the gym, a body that craves and eats holy green foods, to shun the afternoon snack, to be in control of your hunger cravings and to be the one in control of snack urges.

Sipping that extra glass of pure filtered drinking water instead of popping a chocolate candy. Filling up with liquid hydration instead of loaves of bread.

Not to be called a glutton, avoiding being a pig as you also never eat pork. Being the one to open your mouth or to not, to tell your teeth to or to not take a bite.

Earning their second look as you pass them by with a body like a magnet that attracts all eyes. A body with grace and good looks, the sleekness of a cheetah, the strength of a bull. A body with a mind to match, good looks and good thoughts, a winner of prizes in every contest.

Having everything it takes, and putting it all to good use. Body, mind, head and heart. All perfectly balancing with the ease of a stork who rests on one leg. Being the great Huron who then flies away with the fish in its mouth, never to be without the bait that wins the fish.

THE HOLINESS OF THE JEWISH FAST OF GEDALIAH

Weakness in your body, depleted of foods and drinks, not anointing oneself with perfumes or lotions, not cleaning one's hands or teeth, giving it up to feel total weakness as a means to not feed the fuels of anger.

Anger dissipating with the shortness of fingernails, the absence of sharp nails, becoming naturally weaponless, hunger shrinking the size of your stomach.

The body not pumping up with fuel, foods being fuels like charcoal or gasoline, feeling the joy of an empty plate, a plate without taste, a plate without fuels that feed the intensity of your hatreds and thus putting out your fires.

Fires being put out with an absence of strength, not to keep them fueled.

Feeling thirstiness but not giving in to your desires to drink. Keeping a parched tongue so you do not lash it out to say something that will later cause you tears. A tongue that sticks to the roof of your mouth, weak and limp, not to chatter, not to gossip, not to slip and incriminate yourself or anyone else, a tongue that craves water but is not satiated, a tongue to keep in your mouth, to bite it, to gird it, to put it in a muzzle, not to use it as a weapon.

Fasting for a reason, to commemorate a great Jewish leader Gedaliah who was murdered in cold blood. To not have the strength of body to nurture anger against his murderer, instead as you grieve the loss of your body's strengths, to feel grief, sadness, because of our loss of the great life as our leader of the Jewish people. A sadness against those who nurture anger and use it for war instead of to create peace, the loss of a life of a great leader.

A Jewish Fast to keep your body still and your mind inactive, not to fuel fires, but to feel tears, to feel a body that cannot fight, so this sadness causes you peace.

To taste a tasteless tongue in your mouth that is dry and keeping a quiet mouth, with quiet tears, a time to feel an ache in your gut as it is not fed food, to feel this absence of anger as your hunger instead takes you to a place of grief.

A feeling of no arrogance, you are another hungry person in an unemployment line, a stomach that is not fed, not pumping yourself up with unnatural confidence, having a stomach like all other stomachs of all people everywhere that needs food to fill it. Being one of many with an empty stomach leaning on one leg, feeling the weakness of the other leg.

Having weakness, not hating, not in a fight, an absence of a fighting rage, a time to reflect on the plight of those who never have food, to feel compassion for those who must fast everyday.

Walking slowly kicking stones, as the weakness of your body gives you an appreciation for this day of peace, no aggression, not even to whisper a word of anger, no strength in your speech. Feeling your parched tongue, not having a forked tongue, not using a fork to lift food into your mouth. An absence of food, an absence of words.

Loving your fellow, being in forgiveness of those who try to destroy your peace, not having the strength to lift a finger against them, no calories of heat in your stomach. Forgiveness of the wicked as a result of fasting, to then be in a place of no wickedness because it hurts you not. G-D as your shield against all punches.

Like a balloon filled up and then pricked and letting out your air, not being pumped up with anger and false pride, not to boast and not to brag, merging with those around you who are hungry too and not satiated, shrinking the size of your big head with a pin to pop it, as you then get off your high horse and see things as they really are, not to be in a place of looking at reality through rose-colored spectacles.

Seeing the reality of the murder of a Jewish leader and the reality of the Lamentations of Zion with Yom Kippur soon to be here, to be in a place to cry for your family who were victims of pogroms and the Holocaust, to use this Fast Day to change your attitudes and use your life to change hatred into love. Being one who feeds the poor as you feel their hunger in your own gut.

Begging G-D to heal the sicknesses of the world and to feed those who hunger and fast everyday because of a lack of the same opportunities of those who enjoy richness.

FOLLOWING YOUR MIND, NOT YOUR HEART

In life, do we follow the desires of our heart and do what we "WANT" to do, or do we follow our intellect and mind and do what is instructed for us to do as it says in print in The Torah as our guide for good ethics?

If we see a fruit pie and it looks enticing and delicious, do we eat seven fruit pies because it is our desire or "want" to do this? Or do we follow the rules against gluttony as listed in our Holy Books?

If we are hurt by someone who abuses us physically or mentally, do we murder this person because we "want" revenge, or do we follow the Commandment in The Torah that instructs us not to murder?

If we see our neighbors just bought a new car, a beautiful expensive brand new vehicle, and has it parked in their driveway next to yours, do we then covet this new car? Do we covet because we "want" this car for our own? Do we then steal this car because we want to own it ourselves? Do we follow our heart and break good ethics listed in The Torah because we follow our heart losing control of our mind, instead giving in to our desires?

If The Torah commands us not to drink alcoholic beverages, do we instead drink ourselves into oblivion and even then drive a car and become the reason for a car accident and for the deaths of those who you hit with your car? Or do we follow our mind and good sense, our brain, and know that we cannot drink and drive, not only because it is the law, but because it is wrong ethically. We especially should not drink specifically because The Torah tells us not to drink.

So, if we all did what we "want" to do, instead of following government laws and Torah Commandments, we would be living in a Libertarian Society, a society with no rules to follow. Is a society without rules to follow more desirable than a society with rules?

If you become a victim of theft, breaking rules no longer seems so desirable. Instead you wish everyone would follow rules, so you would not have stolen property.

Do we do what we want to do? Do we follow someone's teachings if they instruct us to break The Torah and to do what we want to do instead of what must do? Do we follow what The Torah tells us to do?

Explicitly, YES. We follow the teachings as printed in The Torah at all times! We follow the specific Torah version of our chosen Jewish denomination as it is a choice which denomination you follow, you make this choice and you stick to the rules as printed in The Torah of your choice.

In The Proverbs, King Solomon tells us that "We are smarter than our elders because we follow our Lord's precepts."

Be the good example of righteousness for your elders and children and contemporaries, walk in the footsteps of The Lord following the intellect of your head, brain, and mind, and never giving in instead to the cravings and wants of your heart if they take you away from Torah.