COMFORT FROM THE FATHER

What does "Menachem Av" a Hebrew phrase mean in English? It is a two word phrase that can go both ways, Comfort Father or Father Comfort. 

The month of AV in English means Father. Both my Dad and Uncle died in the month of AV. To remember them as we enter into Tisha Ba'av is an awesome experience. My Uncle's yarhzeit is on 9 AV itself, he actually passed away on Tisha Ba'av, my Dad passed away on 13 Av.

A comforting holy day is Tisha Ba'av for me to fondly remember my Dad. He takes me by the hand every time I need some help, he points me in the same direction each time I call upon him, he tells me to "love God." 

I ask him again, what can I do Dad? Help me Dad, I need your advice. He again says to me "Adonai, and Yah and Emah." God and God and Mother. His teachings to me as I was growing up were to honor, love, and respect my Mother, which is what he again says to me when I beckon him and he says "Emah." As God is everywhere, my respect for my Mother is everywhere and always, as my Father taught me to think.

I wish to dream of my Dad, to see him as I sleep, he once tucked me into bed and kissed my forehead, where the Shekinah is present, he taught me how to peacefully sleep, and now just before sleep I pray the Shema, and hold my three fingers onto my forehead where my Dad kissed me. He then surrounds my entire space with kisses, chocolate kisses, hugs from my Mom and Sister, a time of comfort, a time of compassion, of forgiveness, a time to sleep and remember my Dad as I never forget my Dad or the Lord, my God. 

THE REASONS YOU WERE BORN

Who are we? We are human now with options to follow Jewish mitzvoth, to daven the Jewish prayerbook, to choose  music that brings us peace, to thrive in silence and to study Torah. To follow our heroes in the Torah, to do as they did. To get to know what to do when, how to feel according to how our ancestors felt in different times in past history, to recreate the wheel as we have it, not to invent an entirely new wheel. To write our own Torah. To let others know what happened and how you survived, so they can know how they can survive and hurdle the same obstacle.

Is it okay to say we will be dust and take nothing with us when we die? Is this wisdom, not to flair arrogance, but to prepare people for their eternal future. When can we change the world if all we will be is dust? We can change it now, today, and tomorrow, past present future. We need to constantly choose life, and to choose it so we can change it for those who ail and need our help. If we write our own Torah, can this Torah change someone's life? They must want life over death, and we can give them a reason to live. To have a love affair with God and to fear God, these being the reasons to live.

To live for our parents who are not alive. To be here for them, to feel goodness, righteousness, lovingkindness, and mercy, in their place, for our parent(s) who are not with us anymore. This is the reason we were given birth.

HOW TO LOVE THE JEWISH GOD

Is it possible to love the Jewish God? Can we both fear and love someone? Are we fearing that God will love us back? If you cry out to Him in calls of love and He responds, is this experience of reciprocal love a scary experience, better said, an awesomely incredible, terrific dynamite experience?! If a mortal you love cannot always be there for you, and God is there instead, how dreamingly desire fulfilling wonderful to have a constant friend and companion Who loves you, constantly.

His only requirement is for you to have clean hands.

To wash your hands before, during, and after you praise God, thank God, and love God. To love God immensely as you pour the pure water over your fingers, hands, and wrists. To salivate pure enzymes into your mouth to rinse your teeth, to feel pure water all over your 97% hydrated body, water, water, cleanliness, everywhere. To have watery tears of joy or sadness, to carefully wipe off your tears, to thank the good Lord for causing you an emotional uplift or down feeling of grief, to help you to feel. A heart that loves God and this love leads to your vacillating emotional existence, but governed by thought, by your intellect. To have smart thoughts, to be loving as you think, to think and to feel. To think about love in and with a ONE God and to deeply honestly feel this ONE God, not needing or desiring more than He. Take Him with you everywhere you go, but not in the form of an idol, instead as a blessing, a prayer recited, sung, with your clean lips, a clean tongue, singing to Him praise and thanks. Every beautiful thought or site or sound, all tactile experiences you feel/hear you can account of them as a gift from Him, as a gift to you from your ONE sincere Lover, Adonai. 

THREE WEEKS OF MOURNING IN JUDAISM

Three weeks of sadness, purposeful sadness, mourning, before the Jewish Holy Day of Tisha Ba'av, the date of the destruction of both the first and second Temples of Jerusalem that stood in the place of  the mosque that is there now.

What do we have to be sad about? Is it appropriate to have sadness, to allow, even assist other people to be sad. How can we encourage this sadness without impeding on others to join you, if they are not of the same religion as you. Can we be proud of having the ability to become sad? Yes, there is such a thing as a "Good Cry."

There will be natural disappointments occurring during this 3 week period, accept them, delve into them with a full strength of emotions, ask for help. Who to ask from to help you, easy question, go straight to the Lord Our G-D.

We can alter our mood to one of sadness: things to do to encourage yourself to feel sadness: (e.g. one thing we can do is not anoint ourselves, this means no deodorant, no perfumed lotions, scarcity on daily showers, infrequency of teeth brushing. Or to wear black clothing, black skirt or pants and a black top. To not wear leather shoes or use a leather belt or purse or wallet. To not compulsively brush our hair. To not listen to music, to not indulge in parties, to not cut ones' hair or shave your beard. To visit the cemetery where your family is buried. To withhold on tasty flavorful foods, instead to eat blandly. To keep your fingernails shortly trimmed. To feel the hot sun, to warm yourself, to read a book of sadness, to make sure you indulge in the study of Torah for hours everyday.)

How can we feel sad and be proud we are sad? To view sadness as a righteousness when it is called for, not as a sickness. Can we tolerate the sadness of others without becoming impatient? We can use our loving-kindness and compassion to help them with this sadness because we too are feeling it ourselves. A mutual bonding will occur.

To be sure, however, that you  begin each day with joy, and then to turn it into sadness as the day goes by and you pray. To be sure to be joyful when you start each day, wash your hands right next to your bed first thing in the morning, keeping a cup of water on your nightstand to wash. Before you reach your feet to the ground each morning, begin it with this hand washing and therefore achieve strong joyousness.

It is our L-rd Adonai Who is causing us to feel this appropriate joyousness becoming sadness, thoughtfully, so we remember and honor our Family and Torah Prophets and our Beloved Two Temples so we can plan for the building of a Third Temple in our future, and G-D says this is GOOD.

SOME GOOD ADVICE TO LIVE GOOD

How to have quietness in the middle of a thunderstorm, to stay dry when it is raining cats and dogs, to feel sated with no thirst licking the inside of your mouth and teeth after drinking cups of ice cold coffee with cream and sweetener, to be in a place of comfort, a place where there is plenty of air conditioning on a hot day, or warmth when it is cold.

Is this, these simple requirements what you desire? To have a second and third cup of morning coffee? To want to stay in and rest during your mornings, even on a "manic" Monday? Walk slowly and observe all the cracks in the sidewalks so you do not trip. Flex your fingers as you type to avoid Carpel Tunnel Syndrome. Watch your posture and eating etiquette, arms off the tabletop, legs together but not crossed. Crossed legs interfere with the natural blood flow in the legs, not to put pressure on your muscles. Uncross your legs whenever you notice they are crossed.

Were you the first baby out of your Mother's womb? Wear a red thread on your left wrist as did Esau who was the first and Jacob came afterwards holding onto his brother Esau's ankle. First and best. You can think that if you want. Whatever gives you confidence to live a good life.

Do you like numbers or do you like words? Do you like pictures? Do you like history or do you like science fiction? Murder mysteries or love stories? The genres of the world are open to you. Read, read, and read again.

A cup of iced sugared coffee and a good book. A book it is true can be your best companion. A book or an iPhone, it is yours to have and to appreciate, to thank The Lord that you have it.

"The ego is not to be destroyed. It, too, is a creation of G‑d—and all that He made, He made within divine purpose.

Only this: that the ego must know that it is a creation, and that all He made, He made with divine purpose." [Chabad.org]

THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT

How to conquer negative assumptions, stop thinking that is not real, how to give people the benefit of the doubt instead of reacting opposed to others and blaming them instead.

Do you jump and react with your imagination and assume the negative is occurring instead the problem could be just typical human error and your misunderstanding of the error? 

Take a deep breath and come together with your mind, assume not the worst, do not conger up evil or wicked assumptions instead. 

Waiting for an email and waiting and waiting and it never comes? Someone trips you and dishonors you by not responding to your email to them?  Instead of feeling hurt and getting upset, email someone else.

Realize that people, common people as well as "nobles" cannot always be perfect. They are immersed in error because they are human, and it was nothing that you did that was wrong or inappropriate to cause them to shun you. It is their problem and so don't make it become yours. There are people who can and people who can't.

Give the email a day or two for a response, then email again and inquire of their health and your hope that they are not sick and that is why there is no response to your original email. After that, just drop it and write to the ones who write you back.

Go to those responsive people and usurp their good will and positive feelings for you. That will bring you in unity with G-D The AL-Mighty Father and it will be as wonderful for you as a bath in natural waters that cleanses you all over and you will heal with this love and then be able to heal others the same way you were healed.

Give people the benefit of the doubt and pass your loving-kindness around without hesitation. What happened in the past may or may not happen again. Look forward to the unity of your heart and mind with your family's and friends' and neighbors' heart and mind.

Hence, you can look forward to your Unity with The Good Lord.